My oldest 2 kids went out on dates when they were in high school. I know they both went to prom. My oldest boy may have only gone to his senior prom, but my daughter went her junior and senior year. They also had dates at other times. My next child, Nathan, has never been on a date. he is 22 years old. Okay, granted, he has been out of the dating pool for nearly 2 years while he's been on his mission...Child #4 (who will be 20 next month) has been on one date. His was arranged - he didn't choose who - he was assigned a date (she was a real cutie - got married a few weeks ago). That was back when he was about 17 or 18.
Child #5 - who came of legal dating age over a year ago (legal dating age at our house: 16) - has yet to ask a girl out. Certainly won't in the forseeable future.
Child #6 - still has 3 years to go.
Not dating definitely has its pros and cons.
Pros:
- I don't have to worry about them staying out late with a girl (and what they might be doing)
- saves money (movies/dinners/clothes/....)
- I don't need call waiting for the phone
- no mood swings from rejection
Cons:
- my boys are not getting any practice with "relationships".
- the last one pretty much says it all. It's a biggie...
I wish I knew of a way to help boost their confidence, it's not that I'm in a hurry for them to date, but I think going out a few times before getting engaged would be a good idea. I am curious as to how long after he gets home it will take Nathan to dive into the dating pool.
This clip is my boys idea of the dating game.
3 comments:
Wow. Bill and Steve look so young, but look how well they turned out.
As for the dating issue, I'm not even in that world yet. It's too scary to think about. I am with you on the practice relationships.
You all don't need to sound so smug--my kid is tossing around the words "hoochie and future wife" and might have a countdown clock for his 16th birthday.
I ain't raising no grandbabies!
Hey, give me some credit, I went to J-Prom with Christal, 'member? How could you forget her!? She lived at our house for a while. :P
I'm 25 now and I've dated more girls than Baskin Robbins has flavors. Big ones, small ones, brash ones, shy ones, and a lot in between. But even given that, I don't know how big a believer I am in practice relationships. Relationships aren't like driving, no matter how much we wish they were. Relationships are more like being in love... they just are. I don't think a person's 48th relationship is any more likely to be successful than their 2nd. It's the optimism and attitude you bring into the relationship that makes the relationship worth having, and if your "practice relationships" are fantastic failures, you might simply end up more cynical than likely to be happily married forever and ever.
My two cents. Love you Mom.
(David)
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